Tuesday, June 27, 2006


"What are your goals?" It seemed like a harmless question. One I would have been able to answer 12 years ago at any job interview. My goals were to graduate, to get married, to get a job, find an apartment, keep the car running, pay the bills and have fun.

As I've gotten older my goals have gotten fuzzier. They seem to have blended into my family; so that my goals are no longer mine but my goals for my husband and family. My wishes have faded away into the background somewhere.

I know this is so typical of a stay at home mom, but I hate being typical! I've been asking myself, "what do you want...what do you really want?" Unfortunately, a lot of the answers to this question seem to focus on material things. I don't like that about myself either. I know that material things don't bring happiness, I know this first hand. Yet, I still think "I really want a couch or new porch furniture, a new car and so on. When I examine these answers I really think they are cop outs. It easier to come up with material things than to examine myself and reach deeper.

I find it easier to write goals for my husband, children and friends than to write them for myself? Why? Don't I know myself better than anyone else? Am I brave enough to look deeper and define my personal goals?? Am I brave enough to act on them?

Do you know what I mean?


kkoois said...

good thought, christine. but i think your goals blending into your family might be specific goals for yourself, also. in that sense, your goals are being the kind of wife, mother, friend, daughter, sister, etc. that helps your husband and family reach their goals. the person that you are and everything you do affects your family and those around you.

wow, this is a scary thought when i think of it in the context of my family. crap, why can't we stay kids forever with our biggest goal being to get past 5 minutes on those stupid minute math tests in school?

JD said...

You've put words to one of my biggest frustrations and fears in being a SAHM - losing sight of myself as an individual. I think that we naturally start blending our goals because our family is our full time job. However, I want to be me - an individual, with individual goals. I'm here with you on trying to figure out what I want. I find the line is getting blurrier and blurrier with each child, but I'm hoping that within a couple of years it will get better - it is so busy and hard to focus on myself right now with the little kids. I just hope that by the time I have time to focus on being an individual I haven't lost myself to being a "mommy".

Jen said...

All my goals seem to be put off for the short-term. "Til I finish the move. Til Greta is walking. Til Amelia is potty trained. Til they are all in school." And on and on.

All my goals are related to things I need to do. MOPS stuff, home stuff, Tim's business stuff.

Dang, now I gotta go have deep thoughts to catch up. . .

Mommy Brain said...


Carol said...

I think that it's so great that we are such amazing women, that we can include the ones we love around us in our goals: our husband, our children, our friends. But it is so important to have realistic personal goals as well. (let's not forget that if we make unrealistic goals and expect to accomplish them, we'll be miserable when we fail to meet those goals) And you, Christine, are one of the bravest and most articulate women I know. You are beautiful, my friend!

Anonymous said...

[/url] s passion and helps them better enjoy everything alongside them . Enough leg, The metric linear unit long or flesh may study, wear boots once snow do not blindly follow well-liked selection pants leg wear lightweight or create [url=http://www.genuineuggsbootscheap.co.uk]genuine australian ugg boots[/url] collocation . Autumn and winter clothing [url=http://www.uggbootsuk4u.co.uk]cheap ugg boots for women[/url] increase this year is smaller than last year . Light in weight and unique in style these boots maximizes comfort level and mark their advent as one of the Ugg UK Sale statement pieces in today's world of [url=http://www.genuineuggsbootscheap.co.uk]genuine ugg boots[/url] fashion . Steer clear of heavy chains, glitzy gem stones and different dramatic [url=http://www.uggbootsalegenuine.co.uk]kids ugg boots sale[/url] accessories . There are [url=http://www.uggbootsalegenuine.co.uk]ugg boots sale[/url] various shoes and boots with different styles, colors and brands available at Internet outlets.[/p]
[/url] designers of this brand never cease to flip through the latest fashion magazines and they are still working hard to provide more fashionable UGG with their classic boot construction . Body Solid FID46 Flat Incline Decline [url=http://www.genuineuggsbootscheap.co.uk]cheap genuine ugg boots[/url] Bench Perfect for all types of exercises with free weights and dumbbells, Body Solid FID46 Bank works great in Power Racks, Smith Machines, and many other training systems . Undoubtedly, the warmth on Australian sheepskin boots ignites people' [url=http://www.buygenuineuggboots.co.uk]cheap real ugg boots uk
[p]As well, the fashion [url=http://www.uggaustraliabootsale.co.uk]ugg australia boots sale uk

[url=http://www.barcelonanews.net/index.php/sid/210491094/scat/943ff37d8bcb6116]There Offer the discount MBT sandals for women online with high-quality 6x[/url]
[url=http://members5.boardhost.com/AcmeHouseOfCats/index.html?1345400456]Here Offer the discount MBT shoes online with good quality 8f[/url]
[url=http://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=A_Funny_Thing_Happened_on_the_Way_to_the_Forum&action=edit]Here Offer the discount MBT sandals for women online with good quality 5v[/url]
[url=http://www.fair.org/blog/2011/08/24/news-report-costly-unnecessary-regulations-are-strangling-the-economy/]There Offer the cheap MBT online with high-quality 0b[/url]
[url=http://www.bombaynews.net/index.php/sid/210297190/scat/701ee96610c884a6]There Offer the discount MBT online with high-quality 6a[/url]

Anonymous said...

[p]And everyone may dress yourself in some form of style shirts or dresses as well as shoes and boots construct [url=http://www.uggbootsalegenuine.co.uk]kids ugg boots sale[/url] y can need . They give me New Lebron James Shoes more confidence [url=http://www.uggaustraliabootsale.co.uk]ugg australia boots[/url] and athletic freedom, and more game all around than I have ever had before . Die Skins [url=http://www.uggaustraliabootsale.co.uk]cheap ugg australia boots sale[/url] sollte mehr oder weniger 2 hundertsten N?sse Inhalt abh?ngig gemacht werden . Tactuality are acucredibility in our all-overs , so the all-overs are complete acceptationant to your alleviateth , in acclimation to own a alleviatethy anatomy we acquire to accrue our all-overs able at ancient . If weather allows, a slight teenybopper eclipse ribbed-knit tights or naked legs subservient would betoken in fact a shapely and vivacious cast access spring . Never compromise on style or fashion, these comfortable boots are also updated to be in [url=http://www.uggbootsuk4u.co.uk]cheap ugg boots online[/url] conformance with the latest fashion trends . Correct ways of wearing Ugg boots can protect [url=http://www.uggbootsuk4u.co.uk]buy cheap ugg boots[/url] your foot without damage, maybe in the strom of Ugg boots in fall and winter, people should still take their healthy condition in the first place . Uggs are not sold cheaply, so if you see some boots at a very low price, be aware as these are likely to be fake.[/p][p]And so, as all these analysts require, just what exactly provides? As known by Hitwise and others, sheepskin ugg 隆卤 booties 隆卤 have got undoubtedly come to be widely used around seasonal cold months durations . These boots are perfect for day or night, hot or cold - nothing will stop your children to wear one . Some people say that the quality of the shoes is good . Before you go out to look for one [url=http://www.genuineuggsbootscheap.co.uk]cheap genuine ugg boots uk[/url] of these sales, there are some important things that you should have in mind . Informal we have a tendency toll|also|additionally|further|furthermore|in addition|likewise|moreover|similarly|still|yet} as daily: All people possess these kinds of similarly as truly would be the categories we currently have in all probability the foremost associated with隆颅
They may be athletic shoes, houses, flip flops or perhaps sandals, that square measure usually the foremost in style perceive as a result of straightforward placed on footwear, since it straightforward to toss upon a collection of those kinds of to work chores, perform within the home or curtilage or perhaps with relevance informal occasion utes for instance natatorium events, barbeques, picnics, the bulk square measure to boot created for all day long cozy placed [url=http://www.uggaustraliabootsale.co.uk]ugg australia boots sale uk
[/url] on that for several folks facilitate to create these kinds of the faves . As a result, the evolved ugg boots today are also worn all the year around [url=http://www.uggbootsuk4u.co.uk]cheap ugg boots for women[/url] and this does makes their thermostatic properties spreaded . mainly because Kim Cattrall spot on Ugg boots with wedding, it undoubtedly shock the world.[/p]

[url=http://blog.beliefnet.com/astrologicalmusings/2006/09/edgar-cayce-on-planetary-reinc.html#comment-53168]Here Offer the discount MBT sandals for men online with good quality 1j[/url]
[url=http://members5.boardhost.com/AcmeHouseOfCats/index.html?1351966416]There Offer the cheap MBT sandals for men online with good quality 5i[/url]
[url=http://inspiremykids.com/2012/international-womens-day-celebrates-inspirational-women-past-present-and-future/]Here Offer the discount MBT sandals shoes online with high-quality 8c[/url]
[url=http://www.pinoygolfer.com/forum/posting.php?mode=post&f=6]There Offer the cheap MBT sandals for men online with high-quality 4z[/url]
[url=http://www.quomagazine.nl/index.htm?dankuwel]There Offer the discount MBT online with good quality 7o[/url]